14/04/2017

The Lock In

               
Here we go with another dumb Christian movie. A couple kids in their mid-20s who live with their parents go to a lock in at a church, because they're cool. Unfortunately one of them sneaks in a porn mag (which we don't even get to see, as it's kept inside a brown paper bag the whole time, like booze or something) which either releases or attracts a demon to terrorise them.
          
I'm serious, that's the plot.
                 
                        
After taking a veryyyyyyyyy long time to get going (and lots of scenes with one character's weirdly over-protective parents who seem to be ad-libbing all their lines) we don't even get to see the demon. The kids are transported into some kind of alternate dimension, where horrifying things like a bin falling over and the lights turning off happen. This kind of stuff can be pretty scary, if it's built up right and nicely shot and lit and all that, but here it wasn't. Dear god it wasn't. The whole film is shot in shaky found footage style using an old cam corder, and the audio is straight off the camera (so lots of background buzzing and difficult to discern lines).
It's introduced by an ex-pastor/priest/whatever, and we get the impression that all the kids die or something, but then none of them do! Literally nothing happens. I was hoping for a big silly demon costume and lots of bad gore, but nope just a few badly executed jump-scares and an invisible baddie. At one point there's a Damien-style demon child sitting on the ground, that turns around and goes "neah!", but the effects job on his face consisted solely of darkening up his eyes a bit. A terrible terrible movie. Me and a few friends enjoyed laughing at it, but that says more about the quality of my company than it does the film. It's not good, it's not even so bad it's good. It's just shite.
                 
The Lock In: 3.0